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WTFery emotions

Some days I feel this growing dread, all of the emotions I keep bottled up threatening to explode. I struggle with highs and lows and everything in between, depression, indifference, mania. Despite my seasons of depression I have never let the grief of losing my parents out, I keep it bottled up tight, afraid that if I let my grief take hold I may not come back. This is how I function, compartmentalizing as many of my emotions as I possibly can because I am afraid to give in and let everything out. Maybe that could be my mid life crisis, having an emotional breakdown and no longer being afraid of letting my emotions out. Maybe that is not such a great midlife crisis but it is probably a healthy step to take towards being a whole person.

I will just have to keep working on a list of possible mid life crisis until I come up with something monumental.

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