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My wife Phoebe and I are playing Scrabble and just having a good time, wasn’t too long ago that I couldn’t say that. I used to be super competitive when playing games but now I just enjoy the time together with the person I am playing with, whether it is Phoebe or the kids.

The one game I will not play though is Monopoly as that particular game has always brought out the worst in me. I learned how to play Monopoly from my father and he was cut throat when playing the game. So, I refuse to play it anymore because I don’t want to be that person I become when playing.

Yesterday the United States of America entered into Chapter 46 of our Nations history of Presidents. As with each changing chapter there will be about half of the country who are full of anguish as their candidate lost the election, this is the reality of a Democratic Republic. Many of those on the losing side will not accept anything done by the new administration and will stew in their anger. They will unfortunately not put aside their differences and try to find common ground. Each chapter this seems to get worse and I wonder how long the Republic can continue to function for all Americans when there is so much strife and division.

Take as an example the Keystone pipeline decision, for many this is an intolerable decision, they want the pipeline built and they do not care that it will endanger other Americans in the process. They also believe that cancelling it will raise gas prices, which is a possibility, however the last 4 years have shown that gas prices can stay low without the pipeline. The point of the pipeline itself is to get the oil to the gulf where it can be sold to other countries, not sold in the US. If they wanted to sell it in the US they could build a refinery plant at the Canadian Border and give us a safe source of petroleum products not in danger every hurricane season. A refinery that could also process the oil from North Dakota. This would create more jobs than just building a pipeline, a refinery would mean long term jobs for the foreseeable future.

But the problem is that people on both sides of the political spectrum have become so single minded in their support for their political beliefs, that the idea of compromise and common ground has been murdered. I pray that President Biden can revive compromise in the leadership of our nation. That we can make progress on issues that will benefit the majority of Americans. I also pray that the events of Jan 6 are behind us and armed insurrections will not tear us further apart.

Working through the twelve week program with my wife and daughter. Just finishing up week 3. It is almost like an independent therapy program, it is about taking a look at your own life to heal the creative artist within. It is much cheaper than going to therapy and since we are all three working on it we can remind each other to write our pages and work on our tasks. I would highly recommend investing 20-30 dollars in the book and taking the twelve weeks to work through it. As I progress through the weeks I will provide my insights, first insight is that taking the time each day to write three pages of stream of conscience is more difficult to do than I imagined it would be when I first read it. Some days half a page is a struggle. But onward we must go.

As a long time sufferer of Bipolar Disorder, Anxiety, and Attention Deficit Disorder I would like to say to everyone get treatment if you have Mental Health issues. Life is not always easy and with Mental Health issues the daily stressors of life can quickly lead to crisis. I know medication does not work for everyone, some people have to endure Electro Shock therapy, some can manage through therapy.

The problem is none of these options are cheap, in fact Mental Health treatment can be more expensive than having other physical health problems. If I go to my primary care physician I pay a simple $30 copay, no deductible to be met, when I go to my psychiatrist I pay between $160-$180 per appointment until I meet my deductible, this does not include drug tests every other visit. Because I am on controlled substances I have to go every 2 months for my prescriptions so I pay between $960-$1080 per year just for the psychiatrist, medications just add to the cost. I am lucky that the medications I am on work for me and I am able to function on an everyday basis.

That is the key, I am lucky, I can work and hold down a steady job. When my Mom got sick I was able to take care of her and work, the toll though was I struggled through a lot of hardship, I did not have the best year at work, and my Mom passed away from aggressive ovarian cancer 5 days after her diagnosis on Sept 28, 2019. The ensuing year was so bad I received the worst review I have ever received in 32 years of employment, I did not offer up excuses, I took it as a learning experience and because my Mental Illness is under control I was able to do that. I did not break down though I have come close several times since the death of my Mom.

I know that things could be much worse for me, I have seen what that looks like and I am thankful every day for all that I have and all I can do. The problem is that there are so many others in this world that suffer from Mental Illness and it goes untreated, they cannot function and many of the homeless people you encounter 1/4-1/3, based on statistics on the internet, suffer from Mental Illness. So, I pray that the cost of mental health care comes down and that those who need treatment are able to be treated. I also pray that the stigmas associated with Mental Illness will one day fade into the past.

Another year done and what a WTF year it was. It would be nice if this year could start off better but with the lingering Covid crisis and the election drama that doesn’t seem like it will end anytime soon, it feels like we are stuck in the clutches of a weird B movie that should have gone straight to the bargain dvd bin, but we are stuck living it out instead. I want to start the new year on a positive note but this playing whack-a-mole with 2020 has dragged me down. I hate being a pessimistic person and if there is anything about myself that i would resolve to change this year it would be my outlook on life. I think it comes down to a trust issue, I trust that certain people are going to act in a way that is detrimental to others and that the rest of us will have to navigate the ensuing disaster that follows in their wake.

Maybe I will just resolve to try and write more blog posts and let the rest of the pieces fall where they may. So Happy New Year from WTFery may it soon start showing promise.

For some reason it is that time of year when things just break or fall apart. First it was the dishwasher, needed a new door and logic board but I went ahead and replaced it with a new one because it was getting on up there in age. That was this past weekend. Then there was the flat tire on Wednesday that I still have to get replaced. Today it was the dryer, it started making an awful racket which it has done on and off for the last few weeks, usually just for a few minutes then it would quiet down. Today it became constant, so after work I tore the dryer down and discovered, besides needing a good clean, that one of the wheels that the drum rolls on was completely destroyed in the center and laying almost sideways. Ordered the parts and now have to wait a week for them to arrive. The joys of home ownership.

The saga continues. Even though I was only able to work Sunday on the truck I made some great progress, I got the trailing arms, rear springs, and differential, cleaned and ready for paint. I was also able to tear down the differential in preparation for rebuilding it, still have to clean the inside of it and get all of the metal shavings out. I also still need to clean the brake backing plates as well as the axles, then there is the broken wheel stud that needs to be beaten out with a hammer and replaced, which should prove interesting. Seems like I keep adding to the list of things that need to be accomplished, but also checking off the list of completed tasks.

I received an email from the Department of Veterans Affairs confirming it’s authority to allow their healthcare workers to work across state lines. Think about that for a minute, healthcare practioners cannot necessarily just move between states because as a nation we are so disparate in our laws from state to state. It is no wonder that education and healthcare are in such trouble when we as a nation cannot agree on such simple issues as what defines a Doctor or Nurse.

“VA maintains and continues to exercise this authority. Reaching beyond the coronavirus pandemic and as identified in “VA’s Fourth Mission”, the rule confirms VA’s authority to allow VA health care professionals, who may regularly cross state lines, to deliver care at other VA medical centers, as well as specific private hospitals, state Veterans homes and nursing homes.”

“As the nation’s largest integrated health care system, it is critical VA health care professionals are able to deliver services in regions other than where they may be licensed, registered, certified or limited by a state requirement,” said VA Secretary Robert Wilkie. “Whether we are assisting states dealing with natural disasters or even more so now with their pandemic response, VA is working diligently to get the appropriate, qualified staff to those communities in need as quickly as possible.”

Another episode on the ongoing trials and tribulations of rebuilding a 1969 Chevy C10. Had good weather this past weekend and was able to finish painting the frame and started on the reassembly of the front end. I unfortunately hit a snag when it came to spring compression of the front coil springs, the tool I rented would not come back out through the hole in the lower control arm and there is no hole on top, so I returned the tool and and rented another type of spring compressor from a different auto parts store. Hopefully I will have a chance to test it out this week and get the front end reassembled.

My memory has never been very good but some things have always stuck with me. Being 4 or 5 and helping you work on your 55 Nomad when we lived in Germany. Always being mesmerized by how fast you could lace your boots. Learning what an Airborne Ranger was and being in awe that you were one in Vietnam for 2 tours. Learning what a LRRP was and that was your job in Vietnam. Learning you lost your best friend and team mates to an ambush while you were on R&R and the pain of that day which you carried with you the rest of your life, survivors guilt that drove you to exceed no matter what it was that you set your mind too. Honoring me with the middle name Dean after your best friend. Learning that you were proud of me that I tried to follow in your footsteps even though my body and fate had another path for me to walk. Watching you fight through to the end as cancer ate up your body and took your life. I miss you everyday Dad, I feel like I failed at the last thing you asked of me, to look out for my Mom. But I know in my heart that the two of you are together again. Happy Veterans Day Dad, I love you and miss you.