Another Day

Just trying to think of what I want to write is excruciating. My mind feels adrift, just out of reach. I thought maybe writing my blog post with VI would help stimulate my thoughts. Instead they feel so far away. I am alone in my own darkness. Somedays I just want to give up on trying to write or doing anything creative. Most of the time it is easier to just escape into my work than it is to find balance between work and personal time. Work is so much easier, I know the tasks I need to accomplish and can throw myself into the work because I enjoy it. It is also much simpler knowing what needs to be accomplished than it is trying to create nothing from scratch. It isn’t like I don’t enjoy writing and drawing, I do enjoy them but my mind just escapes me.
I look back at some of my journals and I seem to be stuck in the same loop for decades now. It was so much easier in school to write when I had an assignment to accomplish. I guess I work best when I have a deadline to accomplish. Right now I only write for a reason I can not even articulate. Time escapes me and I find myself in the middle of a desert, running from mirage to mirage.
So I made the mistake of trying to write to a disk with out write permission, never a dull moment when it comes to computers, good thing I know how to fix a few things.